She's A Close Second

Customer: "Until I had to read Mein Kampf, I thought Stephenie Meyer was the worst writer in history"

Barnes & Noble

Overheard by B&N Guy

They All Look The Same To Me

Customer: "Do you have a book on the Tuscany airmen?"

Bookseller: "The Tuskegee Airmen? Sure."

Customer: "It's awful about all those experiments they did on them..."

Bookseller: "Wait, are you looking for a book on the Airmen, or on the Tuskegee experiment? It's not the same thing."

Barnes & Noble

Overheard by B&N Guy

You Just Keep Telling Yourself That

Woman 1: "I got these bites & scrapes from moving my fish from a tank to a bucket. The fish was cornered in half a tank of water, it jumped up over the bucket and gnawed on my arm in the process."

Woman 2: "Maybe your hand eye coordination just sucks."

At a Main Line cocktail party

Overheard by Chaz

True Story

Middle aged guy talking music: "It's not as if Madonna was Florence Henderson."

At a Main Line cocktail party

Overheard by Chaz wondering if Carol Brady actually sang

Just Trying To Make The Neighborhood Better

On my way home from class, I witnessed two homeless women arguing because one was peeing in public and the other one called her out. Here is the exchange:

Homeless Woman #1: "THAT lady over there is just peeing all out in the open !!"(in front of a bank's entrance)

Homeless Woman # 2: "I'm HOMELESS!! I gotta pee somewhere!!"

Homeless Woman #1: "I'm HOMELESS TOO but you don't see me squatting all out in the open!"

Homeless Woman #2: "What??! What, you want me to piss all over myself. Is that what I'm supposed to do? This bitch wants me to piss all over myself!!!"

Homeless Woman #1: "Go in a corner like everyone else..."

Homeless Woman #2: (mumbling) "That bitch is trying to start trouble"

15th and Walnut

Overheard by Workingdayandnight

Extinction of the Guido

Two twenty-something guys at Standard Tap

First guy: "What do you think of Tina?"

Second guy: "Fat ass small car."

First guy: "Dammit now there's no way i can fuck her."

Standard Tap

Overheard by Michael G

When Only The Best Will Do

Lady #1: "Aww, what you doin' here?"

Lady #2: "I'm on a date!"

South Philly Walmart

Overheard by MTSBspidey

Compassionate Gunplay

Young woman on her phone talking to a friend: "If you're big I'm not gonna fight you, I will go to my room, get my gun and I will kindly shoot you"

Anne Taylor Loft, Liberty Plaza

Overheard by mimi