Gotta Keep Those Damn Foreigners Out!

Mom to kids: "No, those couldn't have been the cheetahs. They wouldn't put cheetahs in with a wall like that. Those must have been the Canadian Lynx."

Philadelphia Zoo
Overheard by spots of a different color

I Sure Hope That's An Acronym For A Tax Form

two city workers talking about second life while eating lunch:

guy #1: "did he give you a penis?"
guy #2: "yeah, but i don't know how to work it."

Marriot, Center City
Overheard by thomas

There Is A Dissertation On Gender Role Stereotyping In Here Somewhere

Two Guys in their 20's sitting on the train talking --
Guy #1: "Ya know, I have 2 lesbians who live across the street from me."
Guy #2: "Nice!!!"
Guy #1: "No, it's not like that. They are both real butch. Man-Haters. In fact, the one dresses just like me, and has my haircut. All I have to do is get a wallet with a chain and I could go to Sisters and score free drinks."
Guy 2: "ha! ha! All you can eat tuna too!"
Guy 1: "I used to wonder which one was the male and which one was the female."
Guy #2: "How can you tell?"
Guy #1: "I just figured whoever takes out the garbage is the man."
Guy #2: "That makes sense."

Patco crossing the bridge at rush hour
Overheard by Mr. Lickalotapuss

It's Funny To Pass Venereal Diseases

A young woman is pulled into an embrace by her male friend.

Woman (while giggling): "Stop huggin' me when you got the crabs!"

the corner of 47th & Baltimore
Overheard by gwennluin

At Least She Wasn't Ambulating

girl to friends as they walk across 2nd St.: "You know, I hate pedestrians but every time I'm walking I feel like one."

2nd & Lombard
Overheard by Mr. Can't Believe It

I Understand. I Won't Mix Coumadin and Heroin Either

Girl to friend: "Nah, I can't smoke crack, I have bronchitis."

Zoo
Overheard by and that's the ONLY reason?

Voices of Motor City

Another poor sap, I mean welcome friend, has joined the Overheard In... community.

If you are in, from, or around Detroit, MI check out his site.
Overheard In Detroit

Good Luck Detroit. May your submission box overflow.

Watch Out...Texans Still Think They Are An Independent Country

Mac Counter Girl: "Are you from the West Coast?"
Customer: "No, Texas."
Mac Counter Girl: "Oh, the Midwest, Okay."


MAC Counter Overheard by HoverBoard Girl

He'll Just Use It To Buy Alcohol

Homeless man to three women crossing the street: "I wanna bite y'alls butts! I wanna bite a butt!"

17th and Chesnut
Overheard by Tron

Sounds Like Performance Art

Guy on cell phone: "My bill is how much? What? No, what? How much? Wait a minute. Let me just drop my pants and bend over and you can rape me right now."

10th and Market
Overheard by Jake

Someone's SAT Classes Didn't Pay Off

Trendy girl: "I can barely find the energy to ambulate!"

Fairmount
Overheard by Try walking

There Goes The Tip

Waitress to Patron: "And what can I get you to drink?"

Patron: "Well, we're having two totally different things for dinner, and we'd like a bottle of wine that will go with both. Could we get the sommelier?"

Waitress (after scanning the wine list): "I'm sorry. It looks like we're out of that right now."

20 Manning
Overheard by phdchick

And This Guy Works At The Nuclear Regulatory Commission

Manager ordering food: "I guess i'll have the turkey sandwich...does it come with bread and all that?"

King of Prussia, PA
Overheard by bored at work

I'm Shocked Too...Harry Potter Fans Have Testicles?

Harry Potter Fan-Kid #1: "Go faster!"
(Pulls on broomstick)
Harry Potter Fan-Kid #2: "Ahhhh! Stop hitting my balls!"

U Penn Quad, during Harry Potter Convention
Overheard by Shocked College Student

Lady: That's So Funny...Why Do I Take You Places?

Lady (looking at the menu): "What's a Mayfair burger?"

Her friend: "It's made from red brick!"

Mayfair Diner
Overheard by Mayfair dinee

You Know, The Ones With The 90-watt Lightbulbs?

Old lady in return line at Walmart: "Where are the adult-sized Ez-Bake Ovens?"

Walmart, Montgomeryville
Overheard by Big Momma

Last One Out Of The Pool Is An Aryan!

(one young black girl to another, in regards to white people being in the public pool) "watch, next time you gonna come out wit' blonde hair and blue eyes!"

Marion Anderson Rec, 17th & Catherine
Overheard by Wet n' Wild

Must Have Been A Visting Catholic

the Rev: "..and let's sing hymn #215 from the bottom of our hearts."

(somebody from the choir whispers)

Rev: "Huh? Oh, sorry, it's number 517 -- let's sing #517..."

(another whisper from the choir)

Rev: "Oh, sorry again, it's number 511. 511!"

Somebody in the pews: "Bingo!"

the little Baptist church
Overheard by the little Baptist

The Queer Icon Of The Day Is...Please Make a Note.

Gay Guy #1: "I could not belive that old guy at the club. Who does he think he was kidding?"
Gay Guy #2: "No way was he a real queen. He was a poser. He wants to be just like us."
Gay Guy #1: "Do you know he asked me if I like Judy Garland!"
Gay Guy #2: "oh, no he didn't!"


Broad and juniper
Overheard by Liza Minelli

JAG er stubbe

Saucy lady #1: "No, I'm talkin' bout REAL Mountain Dew." (Points to a little white car in the middle of the parking lot) "Look there, that be REAL motherfuckin' Mountain Dew."

Saucy Lady #2: "Nah, nah, girl." (Points to an SUV on the other side of the parking lot) "THAT be real Mountain Dew. You don't know what the fuck you talkin bout. Shit."

Saucy Lady #1: "Mmmmmhmmm that right."

Ikea parking lot
Overheard by amused while waiting

Uh, Why Do You Think They Got Into Urology?

Man at table: "So I'm giving a talk in Fort Lauderdale this weekend."
Woman at table: "You should get some of those fitted James Bond swim trunks. They're hot!"
Man: "It's a urology conference. They're not gonna be interested in my package."

20 Manning Overheard by phdchick

State School For This One

Excited toddler looking at Jurassic Park figurine: "LIZARD!!"
Bored mom, firmly: "No, Velociraptor."
Toddler: "...Liz....ard???"
Mom sighs.

CVS on Fairmount
Overheard by Jayvee

Paging Dr. Phil

Peppy sales clerk: "The customer is always right!"

Customer's husband, not so peppy: "The customer's husband is even righter..."

Antique shop
Overheard by jayvee

Right Back Atcha

Guy (to Girl): "Listen, I just don't understand how guys can be gay when there's, like, gorgeous women everywhere."

The Orange Line
Overheard by Peter

NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

Little black kid selling candy: "Ma'am, can I ask you a positive question?"

near the LOVE statue
Overheard by the candy ma'am

His Role Model Is President Bush

Teen Boy: (attempting to control small dog on leash) "Don't worry, I'm a dominatrix."
Father and Teen Sister: <>
Teen Boy: "Wait. I don't know what that means. What does that mean?!? I saw it on CSI!"

VF Park
Overheard by Laughing

Outta The Mouths Of Babes

5-year-old girl on bike: "come on, cha-cha!"
6-year-old girl on bike: "don't cha-cha me, cha-cha yourself.. to the left!"

20th & Saint Albans St.
Overheard by chuckles

Please God, Just Don't Drive.

70ish grandma: "Oh heavens no, I would NEVER drive a motorcyle...or a minivan."

Jack's Firehouse
Overheard by Me neither.

Sexual Harrasment To The N-th Degree

receptionist: "Damn! I disconnected Bob's call again. When he gets back to the office, I'm gonna get raped over the coals."

contractor's office in Juniata
Overheard by relief receptionist

Doggie Skittles!

Lady at ATM, watching another lady's tiny, tiny dog taking a dump: "Ooo, look at the little droplets! They almost look like real poops!"

Walnut St. near Rittenhouse
Overheard by Lindsay

Every Journey Starts With A Single Step

Man to himself in park, after waking up from a nap: "I gotta start taking better care of myself....stop PISSING MYSELF!"

Washington Square

Overheard by Betsy

No You Can't. Now Eat Your Satansicle.

3-year old black kid, channeling T. D. Jakes: "I WANT THE WORD'A GOD!!"

Mom: "sshhh."

Kid: "I WANT THE WORD'A GOD!!"

Mom: "sshh."

Kid: "I WANT THE WORD'A GOD!"

Mom: "That's it now. Â Be quiet!!"

Kid: (whispering) "Mommy, can I have the word'a God?"

thrift store on Broad
Overheard by thriftqueen

Tourist Season Reminds Us How Stupid The Rest Of The Country Is

mid-fifties middle class white guy points out city hall to another mid-fifties middle class white guy: "hey look-it's that william tell building and i think on the other side is all them steps from rocky"

broad & chestnut

Overheard by Stephanie Says